Friday, 23 March 2012

HOW TO MANIPULATE ....

MR & MRS BILL

When Bill and Hillary first got married, Bill said, "I am putting a box under our bed. You must promise never to look in it."
 
In all their 30 years of marriage, Hillary never looked. However, on the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the better of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box there were 3 empty beer cans and $1,874.25 in cash.
 
After dinner, Hillary could no longer contain her guilt and she confessed, saying, "I am so sorry. For all these years I kept my promise and never looked in the box under our bed. However, today the temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know why do you keep the empty cans in the box?"
 
Bill thought for a while and said, "I guess that after all these years you deserve to know the truth. Whenever I was unfaithful to you, I put an empty beer can in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it again." Hillary was shocked, but said, "I am very disappointed and saddened, but I guess after all those years away from home on the road, temptation does happen and I guess that 3 times is not that bad considering the number of years we've been together." They hugged and made their peace.
 
A little while later, Hillary asked Bill - "So why do you have all that money in the box?" Bill answered, "Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans....I took them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash!"

Sunday, 18 March 2012

NO ONE WINS OVER A LAWYER BECAUSE...

........ A married lawyer had been having fun in his car with his
secretary.

On getting home, his wife saw a pair of panties on the back seat.


She tore it apart, screaming, "What the hell is this? What have you been up to??".
He calmly replied, "You have just destroyed the evidence of the rape case worth a million for me, which I'm handling. You can forget the jewellery you wanted!".
She quickly fell on her knees apologising.
No one wins over a Lawyer, even someone called A WIFE.....

.............and watch out for the lawyers.

Saturday, 17 March 2012

Tuesday, 20 December 2011

GRANNY'S NEW BOYFRIENDS

Granny's new boyfriends!!
 
A good laugh for the Season.... for those who are past the 50 mark!! 
MY NEW BOYFRIENDS !!!

 
I am seeing 5 gentlemen (give or take)
every day!!

As soon as I wake up,
Will Power helps me get out of bed.

 
Then I go to see John.

Tuesday, 8 November 2011

NEW and EASY WAY OF HAIR CUT







The tale of the Government Employed Barber
(he cuts the hair of Ministers).

While hair cutting, Government Employed Barber, asked PM, "What’s this Swiss Bank issue?” 
THE PM shouted, “YOU are cutting hair or making inquiry?”
Barber: "Sorry Sir, I just simply asked."
Next day, while cutting the hair, he asked DPM, “Sir, what’s this Black money issue?’’ 
The DPM shouted, ‘’Why do you ask me this question?’’
Barber: ‘’Sorry Sir, just simply asked you."
Next day, Anti Corruption TEAM interrogated the Barber, ‘’Are you an agent of the LEADING OPPOSITE PARTY?"
Barber: "No, Sir."

Anti Corruption Investigator:  "Are you the agent of the Leading Opposition Head?"
Barber: "No Sir."
Anti Corruption Investigator: "Then while cutting the hair, why you ask  Ministers about Swiss Bank and Black money issues?"
Barber: "Sir, the reason is, when I ask about Swiss Bank or Black money, the Ministers’ hair stands up straight. And that helps me to cut their hair easily!"

Monday, 31 October 2011