Wednesday, 30 September 2015

THE CHINESE WORKMAN

THE CHINESE WORKMAN
A building contractor hires an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Chinaman. He gathers them all in his office and tells each of them their jobs. The Englishman to shovel a pile of sand. The Irishman has to take the sand in the wheelbarrow to the truck. The Chinaman is in charge of supplies.

The boss comes back two hours later and he sees the Englishman and the Irishman having a cup of tea. ''So have you done the work then?'' he asks....
The workers both shake their heads and tell him that the Chinaman didn't give them a shovel or a wheelbarrow. The boss is infuriated by this and asks the workers if they have seen the Chinaman, they tell him they thought they saw him going toward the truck. So the boss sets out towards the truck and just as he is getting close to the truck the Chinaman jumps out from behind a wall and yells, "SUPPLIES!"

Monday, 28 September 2015

MIND CHANGING CONCEPT

During a robbery in Guangzhou, China, the bank robber shouted to everyone in the bank: "Don't move. The money belongs to the State. Your life belongs to you."
Everyone in the bank laid down quietly. This is called "Mind Changing Concept” Changing the conventional way of thinking.
When a lady lay on the table provocatively, the robber shouted at her: "Please be civilized! This is a robbery and not a rape!"
This is called "Being Professional” Focus only on what you are trained to do!
When the bank robbers returned home, the younger robber (MBA-trained) told the older robber (who has only completed Year 6 in primary school): "Big brother, let's count how much we got."
The older robber rebutted and said: "You are very stupid. There is so much money it will take us a long time to count. Tonight, the TV news will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!"
This is called "Experience.” Nowadays, experience is more important than paper qualifications!
After the robbers had left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly. But the supervisor said to him: "Wait! Let us take out $10 million from the bank for ourselves and add it to the $70 million that we have previously embezzled from the bank”.
This is called "Swim with the tide.” Converting an unfavorable situation to your advantage!
The supervisor says: "It will be good if there is a robbery every month."
This is called "Killing Boredom.” Personal Happiness is more important than your job.
The next day, the TV news reported that $100 million was taken from the bank. The robbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count $20 million. The robbers were very angry and complained: "We risked our lives and only took $20 million. The bank manager took $80 million with a snap of his fingers. It looks like it is better to be educated than to be a thief!"
This is called "Knowledge is worth as much as gold!"
The bank manager was smiling and happy because his losses in the share market are now covered by this robbery.
This is called "Seizing the opportunity.” Daring to take risks!
So who are the real robbers here?